So, for all of those curious about the content of my uterus...
I took said test to bathroom and looked at the packet to make sure I didn't give myself a heart-attack and read it wrong.
It was a Clearblue Digital (I splashed out - after all, what price peace of mind?!). "enceinte" means preggo and "pas enceinte" means not preggo. And then it gives you the weeks.
I had peed on the stick and was standing in the bathroom staring at an unresponsive screen and wondering whether I should try to squeeze a little more of the wet stuff out, when a little timer appeared. Good, at least the test was working.
At that moment, my location was discovered by Timmy and Lily who - when not mortal enemies - are a powerful team. "Mummeeee! Mummeeee!" they cried at the (locked) bathroom door.
"Just a minute!"
Bang bang bang. "Mummmeeeee where are youuuuuu????"
"Hang on, mummy's just doing a pee pee."
The word "enceinte" flashed up on the screen. But surely the "pas" could not be far behind.
"JUST. A. MINUTE!!!"
Bang bang bang.
1-2 semaines appeared on the screen.
So, it's official. As I write this I am 4 weeks pregnant. Or 6 weeks by UK measurements (different start date). According to the doctor I must have conceived on 1st August (my 10 year anniversary).
Reactions have varied from:
"Oh my God?"
"What do you want 5 children for!" (person who said this shall not be named but has gone down in my estimation.
Because once a child is conceived, as far as I'm concerned, you can't greet the news with consternation.
I Do and Will worry that: (1) I won't cope (2) Ray is OLD (3) Ray is OLD (4) Ray is OLD (5) I am a complete nutcase (6) I will never NEVER EVER have my body back... etc.
I never looked for this pregnancy. And it should be impossible.
But little one is trying to grow. And I can only think on a new little life with happiness.
Evie was unexpected, but she makes me smile and laugh every day. There is no doubt in my mind that she was always meant to be here.
Same for this little bean.
Welcome to the world, tiny one.